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Seekers After Truth: The Truth We Are Looking For.



In this blog post I'd like to discuss how truth is one of the most powerful tools in personal transformation, how it works, how we can benefit from it and which truth we are really looking for in order to make a difference. It is a fact that everyone wants truth, but are we focusing on the right kind of truth? And yet, there is a wide spread belief that everybody lies and no one can be trusted. The first fact to consider is that everyone learned to lie in childhood, even when we didn’t want to, so as to avoid the consequences of actions in which we might had not even been involved. Lying is, consequently, a learnt behaviour and which served a purpose to survive during that period of our lives. That period is now over and if we want to grow in a healthy way towards personal transformation we must take different actions.

Truth is an essential element to build trust in relationships. Truth also extends solid bridges with the world. There is more truth in our actions that we could ever find in our words. Too often words are filled with great intentions, which may or may not be followed by action. We often talk about the things that we are ‘going to do’, projects that we have in mind and wonderful ideas. The intentions behind come from our true nature. This is who we are. In most cases we don’t follow words with positive actions leading to successful outcomes. This is because our reality has been shaped by a past of inaction, which in turn made us believe that change is not possible. Learned behaviours are energy which limits beliefs and actions. Truth, our own truth will set us free from these limiting energies and beliefs.

Beside the fact that a lie is a lack of respect, not only to others, but to ourselves and which little by little undermines trust until we lose it all. At this point, we lose trust in others and in ourselves. Words like everything else carry energy. Everyone can spot a liar. However, truth can be difficult to recognise if it differs from what we feel and believe and could often be confused with a lie. Lack of truth destroys trust in our personal relationships and it might even be the decisive factor which determines the end of them.

When we know our own truth, we pay little or no attention to the lack of truth in others, although it helps us to know who and what we can establish relationships with. While I am not condoning lies, our response to them should be less reactive and more understanding. It is often the case that people lie unable to recognise their own truth. It is our own truth we want to bring to light, not someone else’s truth. In the progression of personal growth each individual has a different pace. Let’s be kind and understanding. Who are we to judge after all when we have not yet managed to bring our own truth out in the open?

If everyone decided to embrace their own  truth and ignore the truth that we want in others, the world would change instantly. We only want others to adapt to our truth, regardless of how many lies holds within because dealing with our demons is a painful path. It is in our power to change our own life and to transform the world with the truth that lies within. What are we waiting for? Is this world the place in which we really want to live?


I am going to give a personal account of how truth can transform into a lie without our knowledge and what I did to stop it becoming a reality. Years ago and days before the beginning of a relationship with my girlfriend, she asked me a question that changed my life. It was a very simple question with a very simple answer: “what are you going to do with your jealousy when we are a relationship?” As I said, the answer to this question was very simple. I had never been jealous in my life. In fact, in past relationships, each and every one of my previous girlfriends had tried to make me jealous in one way or another to no avail. The belief and the intention behind their intentions was that if I was not jealous, I didn’t love them, so they did their best to get this feeling out of me. It never worked.  

This time was different. The response that I had given all my life, “I’ve never been jealous in my life”, was one I could no longer use. It only took me a few second to respond and instead I said; “I’ll deal with it.” The reason why I couldn’t give the same answer which had been my truth all my life was because this was no longer true. As soon as she asked I felt a very aggressive energy running through my body, and I recognised that yes, I was, even though there were no reasons for it. For the next few weeks I felt this irrational fear running through me. I did not react to it. I didn’t speak about it. All I did with it was to feel it. I knew that this feeling was mine only, for the time being; and that through feeling I could get rid of it. I must also emphasise that she has been the only woman who never tried to make me feel this way. One thing I was certain of; I was never going to lie to this woman.

By allowing this realisation to take over me, I focused the attention on myself, my own actions, feelings and beliefs. I took responsibility for who I was at the time. Admitting to jealousy, as to admitting to many other emotions can bring upon individuals very uncomfortable feelings. It’s not ‘cool’ to be jealous. Taking responsibility for my feelings and emotions eventually removed these sensations until I no longer felt it.

What this process revealed to me at the time was that I might had been jealous before, but could never feel it. Human beings are great at concealing and avoiding emotions by distracting ourselves with the first thing that we find. The world is full of distractions. Once I focused on myself, someone’s actions didn’t have any effect on me, and as I mentioned earlier; these feelings were completely irrational. What sparked them was not the actions of others, but the fact that I was ready and willing to face my own truth. And this is the only truth that makes a difference. Had I given the 'standard' answer I had used all my life, I would had blocked the emotion with the energy of a lie. This is how we avoid feelings and emoting, but denying what's obvious. The other significant benefit was that as I didn’t react to my emotions, other than feeling in silence, no one heard a word and no situation was raised in which the other person had to ‘defend’ their actions due to my insecurities. The effect that had in me was highly transformed, as I learnt to deal with all my other emotions in a non-reactive manner.

Admitting to our insecurities and truth, does not have to be harder than it should. There is no need to make a public announcement. Admitting this truth to yourself is enough. Reacting to it would only increase the energy of the emotion and will make it stronger. Releasing these energies is not an endless process and we might want to take one emotion at a time. When we react to someone else’s lie, we are acting with pride.

In this process you are the observer. Write a diary as soon as you begin to identify it. Take note of what you are doing differently and how you feel. What you write doesn’t have to be shared with others either. This is your journey and there are things we must do alone. You might want to discuss it with a person close to you, explain how you feel, but only do this when there’s assurance that this person is not going to use it against you. Follow your intuition and be flexible in your methods. Writing helps us to feel, but if you feel that you can deal with it in other ways, do so. As long as you are aware of the emotion, the rest will come along for you to see it.

If you are in a romantic relationship, this might be a good time to admit a few truths and realities about yourself. Use the appropriate communication. Facing our truth will undoubtedly have an effect on our moods and vital energy. It might even give you the impression that you have entered a depressive state. You have not. You are going through a spiritual cleansing, releasing energies. Let your partner know that this process has begun and that you might need more time for yourself than usual, that your moods may change, and you are dealing with your emotions in order to overcome them. Let them also know that there might be a period of darkness, but that eventually you are going to come out and shine in a new light.

Romantic relationships are excellent grounds to identify the patterns that always lead to arguments and misunderstandings. What is it that your partner is constantly complaining about? Is there a truth to it? You are the only one who can answer this question. Pay special attention to the following fact. When we talk about those ourselves, projects we have in mind and things we want to do in a serene state during a friendly conversation, we hear what we really want and who we are. Intentions are always good. How do your actions reflect your words? Pause, stop to reflect and take a different action. The fact that we are not immediately acting upon our words does not make us liars. We have to recognise and accept that for things to change we have to move towards our desired goals. The moment to do so is not when we have everything we consider necessary to begin, but now. We are ready now. You are ready now.

By starting unprepared we learn much more than if we put all those things together, as what we learn is the unknown. That list of things you consider indispensable now, are only what you already know. There are elements missing, and this is the only reason why you never managed to get there. In this case the unknown is that wonderful and creative part of ourselves we have not yet explored. And all it takes is a little bit of truth of what and who you already know you are. Now it’s time to experience it and feel it. And this is our own truth. Everyone has their own truth and their own time to develop it. Too often we try to control someone else’s truth because we cannot admit to our own. This is the clearest sign that we must work on our own. The moment you feel your truth, nothing else will matter and your life will improve and change forever. Are you ready now?

Let's never forget that the truth is within!