Picture this: There's a woman standing in the kitchen chopping vegetables. She's fully clothed. I approach her and stand behind her body close enough for her to feel my presence, but there's no contact. Our silence makes the moment intense, intimate. This closeness alone makes the rest of the world disappear. There's no movement from either of us. My body gets closer, but not close enough. I place my hands on her hips barely touching. She's free to move and go anytime she chooses, but as she feels safe, loved and wanted she remains standing still. Waiting.
We have known each other for seven months. During this period we never fell into the temptation of lust and waited until this moment. I talk to her ear. At times I whisper. At times she can feel my face touching her hair, but that's as far as I go. What I say is only between her and I. There's a strong intention in my approach and in the tone of my voice: love and desire. It's sensual, as well as sexual. There's still no touch and throughout there will be none. The vibration of my voice alone reaches every part of her body and it's flowing through her senses, to which she responds with surrender. All erogenous parts are now activated. I surrender to the present moment too. My words sound familiar, but I don't recognise them. It's my soul speaking to her soul with love and devotion. If there's a world or an Universe out there we don't know. We forgot that anything else exists. We are the Universe.
The moment goes on and on, but I can't measure it. Not then, not now. There's no time. Only the here and now. As I keep talking, I hear and feel her gentle sighs and moans increasing in calm intensity. She is mine, as I am hers, but there's no sense of possession. Expanding in freedom and in love we just wish to remain there. Only two souls playing and dancing to the rhythms of love, passion and desire. Towards the end she lets go a deeper, prolonged moan. I feel it's the right moment to stop. I don't move and remain with her, holding the space. I want her to feel safe, loved. It takes her a while to turn around and talk to me.
"You have no idea what your voice does to me". She says. I do know, I could feel everything she felt, but I listen to her, as she listened to me. My silence honours her silence. It's her time to talk, although she doesn't have much to say. It's all feeling and deep, warm emotion.
"You could have done anything you wanted to me just now." I keep listening. In a way I did, as all I wanted was to love her and for her to feel loved.
"You just gave me an orgasm." She says. I only listen and feel that deep connection we have. That's all we need. That's all I need. Love turns to whispers, then silence. More love follows and yet, there will be no touch for hours and playfulness continues.
Do I have your attention now? Do you begin to see the endless possibility of sacred sex?
What I just described is a moment, an ode to love that is recorded in time in a different dimension for either of us to revisit anytime we wish to. This is a sacred space created for her and I. It cannot be changed or corrupted by anything or anyone, not even by the reader now.
For experiences such as this to happen it is necessary to surrender to the present moment, so as to allow body, mind and spirit to converge. When the soul is allowed to run free and in love, everything the soul touches and creates turns into a masterpiece. And this is what sacred sex is; a canvass for two souls to express their love for each other.
The outcome is irrelevant. It will always be fulfilling and a unique experience. Love and intention are not. When engaging in sacred sex set a strong intention to satisfy your lover, expect the unexpected and see, feel and experience magic and the miracle of love happening again and again and again. Be a witness to love in a different dimension.
One could think that a woman reaching orgasm at the mere sound of the voice of a man would invite ego to participate. Ego cannot enter any sacred space that is created by the expression of love of the soul. Not then, not now, not ever. And this scene I just shared can only be shared with love.
Introducing the element of the voice in sacred sex is very important to intensify and amplify feelings and emotions. One of the reasons why humans feel incomplete is due to the fact that we do not use our bodies and senses as a whole. The lack of coordination between body, mind and soul is such, that day after day we fail to use the incredible qualities we all have and that could take us to explore different pleasures and dimensions. There's no need to seek the artificial, the quick external stimulus, when we have everything that it is required to achieve our goals: our bodies, souls, minds and hearts.
Sacred sex is a perfect opportunity for role play. As long as it is done with love any role serves the purpose. Use your imagination and engage in the moment and recognise and embrace the God and Goddess in you. There cannot be sacred sex without recognising the Divinity in us. Play it until you feel it and from there explore the possibilities with your partner. Playfulness is also an important part in this sacred act.
The best way to engage in sacred sex is when it appears spontaneously and this is when playfulness becomes a crucial part. There is a beginning to it, but there's no end. In this way, a man and a woman can have sex for days, even weeks. It could begin in the privacy of your home or during a walk along the beach. What matters is the intention. And love, above all love. During sacred sex, ejaculation is not important to a man. He can wait for days and days. It's not the goal for a woman either, although when done right she could reach multiple orgasms that a man would also feel through his body. This is an act of love, in which two people honour each other through touch, feeling and emotion. The physical sensations are enhanced and when experienced, what one feels, the other can feel too.
During sacred sex it is important that the intention is to satisfy your partner without asking anything in exchange, allowing them to express themselves freely and reciprocate in whichever way they want. It is always a mutual exchange and when done with such love and freedom, the other person would want to give you as much pleasure as they've been given. It could go for hours or days. It can be stopped and continued. In freedom and in love there are endless possibilities.
It is a matter of surrendering to the present moment and allowing the soul to take over. When this happens we create a connection with cosmic energy, allowing currents of electricity to flow through the spinal fluid until it explodes at the back of the head. This is a natural feeling for women during orgasm, and any man who has experienced this kind of orgasm would know that ejaculation is truly overrated. The longer one waits, the greater the pleasure. One of these moments could take place during that walk by the beach. There's no rush. Love is patient. It can wait. The dance of two souls have begun, but never ends. What's important is the exchange of feeling, emotion and energy.
Sacred sex is also an excellent vehicle to regulate sexual energy as it allows it to flow throughout the body. Sexual energy is imbalanced in most people, which can lead to all sorts of sexual problems.
If you never had sacred sex before, when you have your first experience, even if you had sexual partners previously you will know that you have never been touched by love or with love. Although it is better to be introduced to it by someone who's experienced, with love, anyone can do it. It takes practice. That's all.
When the soul is allowed to take over, words come from a different place, never from the mind or thought. One knows which part of the body to touch and how to do so at anytime, which increases the pleasure of the partner, as well as our own, since there's an exchange of sensations. The soul is directed by universal wisdom. If you have a new partner they will undoubtedly ask you how you always know what to do and where to touch next. There's not much one can say to this. Sacred sex is not the time for lectures or explanations. You know by feeling, energy and through your connection to the Universe. Your soul is the most beautiful and impressive of lovers.
Sacred sex creates a sense of 'addiction' to your partner, some sort of complicity that only you and them know about. This is transmitted to others by just being together and keeps possible suitors away. It is clear that what you two have is truly special. This does not mean that a relationship cannot end. They do when the time comes. A conscious person knows when to let go of another with love, knowing that this connection between two people is always there, and that even when they're gone, there's nothing lost.
This feeling and belief increase when during sacred sex, one can see and recognise their souls in their lover's eyes. The intensity and beauty of this moment cannot be described with words, and it is certainly one to experience. Such recognition is spontaneous and both we'll see their souls in their lover's eyes at the same time, as if their souls had exchanged bodies for an instant. Once this is experienced, regardless of what happens in the future, you will always love that man or woman, as you know they're within you, that you are one. Forget about the idea of twin flames or soul mates. Such experiences show that with love, anyone can be that special person you've been looking for all your life. We just have to open our hearts to them and allow ourselves to become vulnerable in order to receive the limitless pleasure a soul can produce. It does take a lot of trust.
If you have experienced one of these moments, know that wherever you are or whatever you're doing, you are still loved by that man or woman and that you'll always be in a very special and sacred place in their hearts. Never doubt this. These moments are forever. To me reaching this place is to show the other person that this is love, this is safe, and this is home. Perhaps the relationship does not last forever in human terms, but it is forever to both souls. And the connection is always sacred.
Let's remember than in love, we are prepared to do anything for the other person. Sometimes letting go is the most beautiful expression of love we can offer them. Everyone has their own path. Love understands if they have to go.
Sacred sex is also a deterrent for people who only look for a lusty quick fix. While it makes you more magnetic and more attractive, it also allows you to set stronger energetic boundaries. Others may approach, but not close enough. The benefits of sacred sex are multiple. It increases confidence and sense of self-worth. It does improve your health, the sense of space and time or happiness. It is a life changing act. One that helps to reconnect with the soul. A door to a higher consciousness, as well as being a pathway towards enlightenment.
If you are single and have experienced sacred sex, the benefits remain with you. It allows to wait patiently for a partner at a similar level or to seek someone curious and willing enough to experience it and be introduced to it. If by any chance you fall for someone driven by lust, it is very likely that this relationship never begins. The Universe will produce the right circumstances to prevent it. The difference between both energies are abysmal and in a way are protecting you from making mistakes you're no longer prepared to go back to.
Keep loving them, but allow them to keep falling in lust with more lust until their ego's plan collapse and have no option but to recognise the Divine in them. Love and lust are two different paths. One cannot travel with the other.
At the same time it emits a higher vibration that would attract more appropriate mates. By thinking and entering previous moments of sacred sex with a different partner, the energy of the those sacred spaces created returns to your body and can re-enact similar sensations to the ones described above. The key is to keep loving. No man or woman who have experienced sacred sex for a prolonged period of time would doubt themselves as lovers. They will always be attractive to others.
Nothing positive can be said about those religions which have engraved the human psyche with fear, guilt and shame of sex in order to control the masses and to keep humanity unconscious by preventing people from exploring their bodies and souls freely. Shame also on a society which delivers a pornographic message with each item sold and bought; from a vibrator to a sandwich, but that equally has placed a taboo on the free expression of our sexuality. We got to the point in which if we don't buy it, we can't enjoy it.
Needless to say that the same partner is required for sacred sex. And a little warning here. One could memorise these words I've just written and learn them by heart in order to seduce others, but sacred spaces cannot be used to either satisfy ego or lust. You might be able to fool a few, but there are always consequences to such actions, which in turn will return and hit you back. Sacred spaces are for love and love only.
If you have been introduced to any sacred spaces by someone in order to make your life better, but told that it was a little trick and you used it to obtain a positive answer to satisfy your ego, whatever method this is becomes a trick on you and consider yourself, the trickster, tricked. Someone experienced in sacred spaces would share freely, but would also know of your real intentions, wording their sentences carefully. If it's sacred, use it well, or not at all.
There's so much to say about sacred sex, a poetic passage between two souls that lingers in time, but there are no rules to follow. One has to allow themselves enough freedom, trust and vulnerability to experiment. It is the ability to explore each others body's with love, with courage, without fear, openly exposed to each other's love and wisdom.
Perhaps to add that sacred sex can be used to heal sexual traumas, but that might be more appropriate for a different blog post.
Sacred Sex: Is the sex you have as safe as you think it is?
Sacred Sex: Is the sex you have as safe as you think it is?