This article is especially written for men with the intention to inspire a healthier approach to relationships between man and woman. There are so many things a man can do to have a successful relationship with their partners. Relationships are never easy. Even knowing everything a woman needs and wants is not a guarantee of a successful relationship. What matters is that we try, that we're not afraid of falling in love, and that when we try we do our best.
The difference between a boy and a man is that, a man would never be afraid to say, "I Am In Love."
It would be easy to write this article from the view of someone who's going to begin a new relationship, when no mistake has yet been made, even though it's not always the case. Perhaps the first belief that one could change in relationships is that everyone makes mistakes. Admit it, accept it and do your best. Again and again and again. Show persistence. When there's love, mistakes are easily forgiven to a certain extent. Some actions are harder to forgive than others. In any case, with love, intention and the appropriate actions, any man can change, and begin to explore their existent relationship in healthier ways, if this is what's required. Not everyone is in an unhealthy relationship. And not every relationship fails because of a man.
All relationships face obstacles, however healthy they may seem. It's how we handle and overcome these obstacles what makes the difference. Every day is a new opportunity to begin anew in a relationship. Every man has what's needed within to make their relationship healthy and successful. It might take time and perhaps we make every mistake in the book, and some that have not yet been written, but eventually anyone can get there. Everyone wants to love and be loved. And after all, love is all there is. Sometimes it takes time to understand this.
Relationships have to be balanced in terms of giving and receiving. If one gives more than the other, the imbalance might be a reason for the end of the relationship. Sometimes giving too much it is as unhealthy as giving too little. When we give too little is because we either don't care, don't know how, or both. When we give too much it might be due to the natural expression of a loving, generous heart, but also because we are in desperate need to be liked by the other person. This article, however, is not focusing on problems, but simple solutions, to suggests new ways. One way to find solutions is to focus on them. While we look at the problem, the problem only grows. Also, this blog post is about improving, not to state that any relationship is unhealthy.
For the sake of this argument, let's say that a man is beginning a relationship tomorrow. If someone is already in a relationship, tomorrow can also be a new beginning, if not today. In life we have an opportunity to improve and better ourselves anytime we choose to. Most people don't change because of what others would say or think. Change does take courage. A man would have this courage, would not listen to what anyone says and stand by his decisions at all times. There's beauty in courage and nothing more beautiful than one that chooses to show the best of his new self to the himself, as well as to others. This is courage.
When a man loves a woman, the most beautiful gift they can offer them at the beginning of a relationship is to create a space for both, in which they can exchange freely without expectations. Expectation is a plague in relationships, and the downfall of everything. I give, so you have to give me back. This belief is unhealthy. The role of a man in a relationship is to support his woman. This does not mean that he goes to work while she stays in the kitchen, or that he has to buy two hundred pairs of shoes for her. No one needs so many shoes. Expectation makes us insecure tyrants.
The space that is provided is free for either to enter it whenever they want to. When they choose to have time and space and remove themselves, this is also freedom. It doesn't mean that a woman doesn't love you, simply that she wants time and space for herself. Everyone needs that from time to time. Men need it too. Do worry if someone doesn't need their space and time. When the space shared between two people is filled with love, trust and this kind of freedom, it becomes magical, creative and expansive. It is a space in which both, man and woman can grow and develop together, as well as individually.
Once we begin the relationship, let's consider that before today, she was a free woman to make her own decisions, choose to see whoever she wanted to and do whatever she pleased. And so were you. Commitment to a relationship perhaps excludes certain activities and whom one might or might not see, but it should never be a prison for anyone. Not for a man; not for a woman. The bond created by love is and should be enough.
It is important to understand that everything in life is a paradox. By offering such a beautiful space, full of love, trust and freedom, what we create is also a magnetic field to which both partners would want to come back again and again. Letting go of the loved one at the beginning of the relationship is a wonderful gift. Consider that this woman might have never been offered such freedom. It's new and it's exciting. Keep love and freedom flowing and she will feel safe and loved. Letting go is a sign of strength in a man, character, self-belief and confidence.
If with this freedom a woman chooses to go and never come back, it has nothing to do with you, but with them. Eventually they would do so with or without freedom. The sooner they're out, the better for everyone. Sometimes love is not enough. Keep loving them no matter what their decision is.
The supporting role of a man in a relationship can be understood from the perspective that he enables a woman to achieve her dreams. This could be a course she wants to take, a career, a trip she's been dreaming of, or simply a hobby. She could be a young singer and songwriter, the most beautiful woman you've ever seen, without the means to buy a new guitar to play. This is the time when a man finds the money even if he doesn't have it, and buys that one guitar, not because he wants something in exchange, but because this woman, this talented artist is going to show him her soul through her music, her lyrics and her enchanting voice. And when she sings for you, this will be a moment you will never forget. A guitar is a magical tool to create more magic in itself, but when is bought with the heart, we allow another part of the soul to come alive in both, man and woman. Don't forget, this is love and you're in love. Anything could happen.
If there was ever a most beautiful, magnetic mermaid, this is she.
Love and relationships are about collecting such memories. The more moments and beautiful memories we create, the stronger love will be. Even if the relationship ends, love remains, and that moment when she sang that song for you, it's only for you and her; forever in time, just for you both. Imagine that!
When buying this guitar, the action must also be fuelled by the same intentions, love, trust, freedom, and again, no expectations. For the uninitiated, a guitar might just seem another item, but when purchased with this intention, it becomes magical. Only good things can come out of it. Imagine the sound of that guitar when she's playing alone in a different room and you hear a song she picked just for you; calling you. "Hey Mr Tamborine man, play a song for me." This is the magic of love. You will recognise it. You will know it's for you, and you only. You will feel the happiest man alive. In love. And you'll never forget. Once you love a woman, you'll always love her. Make sure she knows.
There's one other element to consider that's introduced in the relationship when providing freedom to a woman. She feels safe and more willing than ever to express her feelings, emotions and open up more of her soul for a man to see. When a woman feels free to express herself in whichever way she wishes, magic does happen. You'll see it in her green/hazel eyes.
I will keep saying this until the end of time. For centuries women have been consigned to a secondary role in society; time that was used to nurture others, but also to remain more in touch with the soul. In a way, one could say that women are the keepers of the collective soul. If they don't show it, and perhaps they don't even know it, it's due to the fact that they've never been allowed to express themselves freely. Freedom allows creativity. Creativity is what the soul is and looks for.
A relationship is the perfect scenario for a man to see himself through the eyes of a woman. Together you will experience the most beautiful expression of love. In love and in freedom, this woman will expose openly the wild woman within herself. If you are a man and want to know who you are, look with love and respect into the eyes of the woman you love and you will see that you and her are the same, that we are one.
It is essential that within this freedom you never ask anything from her. When you allow this freedom, she will give much more than you could ask for. Well, perhaps you could allow yourself to say, "hey my beautiful mermaid, write a song for me." You will know when the time is right.
As I wrote in my previous blog post: 'Sacred Sex', while feeling free, there's a magical moment that takes place between a man and a woman in which one can see themselves in the eyes of the other, as if souls have changed bodies momentarily. Having this experience, no man would look at a woman in the same way again. It is a truly magical moment.
At the same time, a woman will gradually get to know herself in a deeper level, as she is now allowed to express herself with freedom, as she chooses to, without expectations. No need to please or to entertain anyone. At reaching this moment, miracles do happen. This space is magical and creative. We see little of the soul because there's no such freedom present in relationships. People remain guarded even when in love. This new freedom is unfamiliar, unexplored and it's full of surprises even to the self. Let's not forget that it works both ways.
Let's not underestimate how creative the soul can be. Remember that you're in love, and in love, creativity is spontaneous. All that is needed is that freedom we were never allowed to experience. Now you know where to find it. It's in her eyes, in her heart, in her soul.
Finally, do let her know she's your Goddess and treat her as such. Then she will know that the poetry of your soul is for her, just for her
The following blog post provides a useful tool to a life changing experience, and new beginnings.
How A Spiritual Reading Can Transform Your Life Immediately.