This is the last week of this series on self-love. From here on I could keep suggesting new ideas and tools to find self-love and own it, but there is a time in which we all have to find our own direction and solutions to what we are looking for. If you followed this series from the first week, by now you must have had your own insights and be ready to create your own manual on how to find love within. When we find love within we find it everywhere we go. Self-love is the door to universal and unconditional love.
The main reason why self-love is so elusive is because we keep listening to everything negative that has been said to us and about us in the past. It is a tiresome, monotone soundtrack that we keep playing in our minds. The truth is not that we cannot find love, but that we fear love. We fear reconnecting with who we really are in order to begin to play the music we all carry within. A few people no longer listen to the noise of the world, but to their own music.
When we fear love courage is needed to discover it. Courage will lead us to love and to the incredible and endless beauty that we all have within. The path to self-love is an inner journey, so the experience is not being courageous about the external. In some cases the expression of this courage will be projected outwards, as we are all part of one collective consciousness and how we interact with others is crucial to find self-love.
However, there is a great misunderstanding in regards to courage. It is not being the hero who saves the day in public situations, but the hero who saves each day by finding the true voice of the soul and finally expressing it to the world in ways we only dreamed of even. And we do so even if our voice is shaking. It takes practice to give true expression to the soul. When we hear it, we recognise the sound of self-love.
Use courage to admit who you are at the moment and bring truth to life. Before we remember who we really are, we have to experience what we are not. Every flaw that you might believe you have is only there to show you what you have to improve and change. This could be jealousy, anger, insecurity, selfishness and a long list of traits which are considered negative. It is OK to be all of it until we stop being any of it.
A way to know whether this trait you doubt is negative or not is to see it if helps everyone around or just you. We are here to help and uplift each other. To make this world a better place together and all our actions should benefit everyone involved. In the case of selfishness I already discussed it in previous weeks and it is OK as long as we do not cause harm or take something from others.
The way to change this is to admit what we are now. Admitting to any of it does not mean we have to broadcast it to the world. We admit it to ourselves. Yes, I am jealous. Yes, I am selfish. You might chose to do so publicly or to share it with a friend or a trained professional. There is nothing wrong in admitting who we are at the moment. If we really want to lead a life worth living we have no option but to forget the things we have learned and adopted from others. None of these traits are who we really are. We might act it, but it is only a learned behaviour. As we have used it for so long, we got the impression that it is real. It is not. That flaw that you believe is your real identity and self is only covering your true self and the only route we can take to remove is by bringing truth. This is the part in which courage is essential.
Courage is necessary to admit to it, as it is to feel all the emotions and feelings that follow without reacting to them. Think of it as if you were returning a flaw back to the universe, not as a part of you which is crucial to give you identity, character or personality. Courage is about learning to find your new expression and to stand firm to voice it. You might surprise others as you change. It is your right to change and to improve yourself every day of your life. Your soul wants to expand and be free, through truth, love, and self-love. You owe it to yourself, not to anyone else.
Courage is also needed to go through this experience, as when we admit to a trait that we have been denying until today, feelings and emotions inevitably follow. This is certainly to weaken you. Don't worry and do not give it too much thought. This weakness is not real either. When you come of the feeling process you will be strong as you have never experienced. That day, all your actions will be love and self-love. It might be a painful experience to begin with, but it is certainly worth it.
If you missed the previous weeks you can either find the links in archives or click on week 6 and follow the links to the rest of blog posts.
Finally, do not give yourself a hard time when you realise that you are something you are not and you couldn't see it for so long. It's not your fault. It is not anyone's fault. Humanity is too keen in finding escape goats to blame for everything that went wrong. Please do not fall into this trap. You might also feel that you have been lying for most of your life, but this is also fine. We all live and express a lie unknowingly until we see the truth. Forgive yourself. You know that the intention you always had was good. If it came out in the wrong way is because we don't know better. We are here to learn to love and whether we like it or not, we make mistakes. This is what was taught to you at an age in which you didn't have to awareness or the tools required to challenge it. Now you do and deep within you know the truth.
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